It’s Autumn again.
The falling leaves, the cold mornings, and feeling the afternoon sun on my face.
Another year has passed, another Autumn arrives.
I try to practice what I preach, I try to remain true to my form and my beliefs as I immerse myself into the life of the ‘9 to 5 crew’.
I try to write, dream and make lists to keep myself going.
But as you might have noticed from my long absence, it’s very hard.
It hit me – this whole ‘be a grown up, settle down, get a real job’ – right where it hurts me most: my essence. My playful, hopeful and dreaming self has taken the hit this past year.
I don’t really like it – I hate it mostly, but I try my best to stay true to myself.
But I was talking to a friend about death and fears tonight- and how precious this time that we were given actually is. And I had an epiphany: I’m so scared of loosing people, feelings or things from my life.. I get hang up on them.
But I have to remind my silly self sometimes: the important stuff stays – old friends that become lovers, good times that become memories, dreams that become reality.
Everything transforms, everything changes constantly. But the essence of who we are and what made us who we are STAYS. We keep it inside, we carry it with us no matter where we end up.
And like most affairs of the heart (of my heart) – Autumn is a good time to come back to basics (my basics) and start working on my dreams again.
So if you’ll excuse me for now, I’m going back to my books, my lists and my inner fire.
You’ll hear from me sooner this time.